


This Isn't A Fairytale

by nestine



Category: B.A.P
Genre: M/M, daejae - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-07
Updated: 2014-09-07
Packaged: 2018-02-16 11:11:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2267550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nestine/pseuds/nestine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Daehyun may have been given the perfect face, the flawless life – almost a prince in disguise -- but everything comes with a price. This near prince is selfish, spoiled and unkind. He is cursed by an old beggar  and the spell will only be broken if he learns to love another and earn a love in return but if on his 21st birthday, he shall not succeed then the words will be permanent and he’ll stay as ugly as a beast. Will Daehyun find someone who can break the curse?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue: True Love Runs Out

**Author's Note:**

  * For [greasytree](https://archiveofourown.org/users/greasytree/gifts).



> Written for the thebrowniebunch fic exchange Round 3 :)
> 
> And yes my first ever DaeJae fanfic I've finished writing. Thank you andnowforyaya for the beta and suggestions. You really are the best. accept my love. I've added a few stuffs so the grammar errors and stuffs are all on me. TTTTT To greasytree, I hope I gave justice to the prompt you gave and Im really sorry for the ending. :( Thank you to Divine, Marian and Kez for reading the fic part by part during the times I'm still conceptualizing and for the suggestions and comments. :> Thank you to the browniebunch mods for this exchange, you guys are awesome!

  
** Prologue: True love runs out. **

 

Who is to blame when love fails?

Statistics never lie, but lovers often do. The sad truth has unsettled many love stories into complete oblivion. Most of the time, people choose to escape when things get uneasy. Nearly everyone’s ultimate back up plan is to run, and running away from love is a desperate measure whenever everything becomes vague.

As cliché as it may seem, sometimes running away is the simplest way out. And everyone wants the easy way out. Sometimes, running away signals a more dramatic outbreak, or sometimes it defies the truth, prolongs the agony or stores an insuperable amount of guilt. Breaking away from everything is the most painless way to hide the pain -- ironic isn’t it?  
So Yoo Youngjae opted for the simplest decision, but it is not what his heart desired.

~~~

Youngjae tells himself that Jung Daehyun is out of his league, that Jung Daehyun isn’t going to fall for him, that ignoring Jung Daehyun will be the best decision that he can make in his entire lifetime, that Jung Daehyun is an elusive dream that Youngjae cannot possibly even try to reach, and that befriending Jung Daehyun means crossing an unfathomable sea that will probably cost him his life but when Jung Daehyun gives him a shy smile, arm outstretched and offering his hand for a polite shake during Chemistry, Yoo Youngjae forgets everything and stupidly replies, “Who, me?” in which Jung Daehyun releases the most beautiful laugh Youngjae has ever heard, too pleasant to his ears, too delightful to his heart.

 

_Uh oh, here comes trouble._

Jung Daehyun has an atypical characteristic -- his personality differs from what you see, and surprisingly, still, people are enchanted by him.

“I’m Jung Daehyun, and yes, I’m talking to you, Yoo Youngjae.”

And Youngjae almost falls onto the floor from his seat because Jung Daehyun knows him, recognizes him, is talking to him and knows his full name. _The_ Jung Daehyun.

_Well, Jung Daehyun is handsome._

The description might need some tweaks and improvements though, because Jung Daehyun is not just handsome but exceptionally good looking, with the perfect mixture of sharp features and gentleness; everyone in the university wants to get in his pants or to remove his pants or to see him with no pants or better, the three combined.

Daehyun’s voice is an impeccable work of art -- it’s like the perfect combination of coffee and milk, is clear and smooth when he sings but a little higher than when he speaks; Youngjae was drawn to it the moment Daehyun belted his high note during a freshmen party. If Youngjae could compare his voice to a dessert, it would be chocolate, sweet, tempting, and addicting. If eating chocolate is a sin, then it's a sin Youngjae wouldn't think twice to commit over and over again.

It occurs to Youngjae that he pretty much day-dreamed in front of his classmate and that it has been awhile since Jung Daehyun’s hand has been waiting for his own, so with much fumbling and Youngjae doesn’t even know why the hell is he messing up, he reaches for it and -- _good heavens_ \-- Jung Daehyun’s hand is so soft. The number of people staring at them, clearly curious about the little moment happening, is growing incredibly fast.

And Youngjae knows people are looking, and soon their little introduction will travel like lightning to the university paper's headlines: _"Poor Man's Son Befriends Mr. Popular!"_. So he quickly removes his hand, partly because he doesn’t want to taint Jung Daehyun’s reputation -- _as if it could ever be tainted_ \-- and partly because the longer he holds Jung Daehyun’s hand, the redder he will become.

“Nice to meet you Youngjae.” Jung Daehyun speaks again and the butterflies in Youngjae’s stomach are going wild; his heart is rapidly pumping back and forth against his ribcage. This is the first time in two years he and Jung Daehyun will be in a class together, the first time that Daehyun has started a conversation with him -- well, none of his block mates talk to Youngjae aside from the times they need his help on homework and stuff, because apparently Yoo Youngjae is --

“You don’t talk much, do you?” Jung Daehyun laughs again, cutting Youngjae in his trance. “Or do you just hate me?”

And Youngjae is taken aback because not in a million years would he have the audacity to even think about hating Jung Daehyun, so his lips start to utter words in defense but in an idiotic manner. _Good job Youngjae, good job._

“Uhm, well, don’t, I, hate.”

Youngjae joins debates and orations so he usually doesn’t have any problem with public speaking.

“I, well, uhm, Youngjae, since, uhm Daehyun is.”

Youngjae joins spelling bees and he’s a talented speaker and this moment is once in a lifetime so Youngjae probably needs to get his shit together right now -- “I don’t hate you,” he manages _fucking finally._

Daehyun heartily laughs again. “You’re cute.”

And to Youngjae’s surprise, feelings are escalating very quickly, he feels his stomach crying in pain and he wants to puke. He needs medicine but Jung Daehyun isn’t medicine, he is a drug.

The growing number of eyes focused on them is rapidly increasing, and Youngjae wishes their Chemistry professor would jump out right about now because Jung Daehyun staring at him isn’t helping his current _don’t mind me_ status. The murmurs of _why is Daehyun talking to him_ aren’t really helping his will be status too.

“Let’s be partners then. You can’t say no Youngjae,” Daehyun says while he grabs Youngjae’s hand and he feels ticklish when the point of the pen touches his palm. It happens suddenly and ends abruptly. But the lingering feeling of Daehyun’s touch still exists.

“That’s my number, text me so we can start to work on that project, okay?”

“O.o.kay,” Youngjae blurts out with slight errors and hardships. _Good job!_

The Chemistry period ends and Daehyun leaves Youngjae in a mix of emotions ranging from horror, to joy, to confusion, to surprise. Youngjae, only after a couple of minutes comes to the realization that the almighty Jung Daehyun’s number is written on his palm. He swears he will never wash his hand.

And his heart might have suffered a few ups and downs and will be encountering bumps along the way as the image as the moving image of Daehyun winking at him loops forever in the back of Youngjae's mind.

Then suddenly they are on a dining room and there's cheesecake and Youngjae is handing him a slice. Soon, Youngjae is holding his hand.

“Mr. Jung Daehyun.”

“Daehyun”

“ _Daehyun._ ”

And Daehyun is transported elsewhere and he sees his seatmate gesturing for him to stand up and he does with half lidded eyes, wobbling knees, and a half awake brain. He recognizes Ms. Choi raising one eyebrow, but he doesn’t notice the fuming expression.

Daehyun answers, “Uhm, what was the question?”

The class bursts into a fits of laughter because there wasn’t even a question raised to begin with, and though the room is clouded with noise, still Daehyun’s mind is at a haze.

“Meet me at the principal’s office.” These are the last words Daehyun hears before Ms. Choi storms out of the room.

Daehyun is lost. He is really confused because one moment Youngjae is flirting with him and the next thing he’s being asked to visit the principal’s office. What the hell is going on? His eyes desperately scan the room, searching for answers until he finds a dreadfu lone: he sees Youngjae with those thick rimmed glasses at the front and their eyes meet for a split second. Everything is sinking in. _Oh._

“Oh,” he says, as one by one all things begin to make sense. And then the light bulb…

“Oh,” he says more loudly this time. “It was a dream.”

“Again.”

  
  


~~~

Yongguk treats him to a hamburger and added some fries after Daehyun’s little trip to the principal’s office. The guy is asked to undergo a community service due to his continuous behavior in certain classes.

“So you’re telling me it’s Yoo’s fault?”

Daehyun can’tbelieve Yongguk is asking him this question for the fourth time. Of course it was Youngjae’s fault -- the guy could have put something on Daehyun’s food so the latter will see Youngjae in his dreams.

“I told you hyung that Youngjae guy must have done something tome that made me dream of him,” Daehyun says in all seriousness.

“You _do_ know how stupid it sounds.” Yongguk gives him a questioning look. Yongguk sees all the stupidity in everybody and wants to correct everything. He can't let this one pass. "Not everyone is going to fall for you because you're good looking"

Daehyun heaves a depressing sigh because he knows it’s stupid too but what other possible reason is out there in the open? They say dreams are reality we long to come into contact with, but in Daehyun’s experience, it’s the complete opposite. Why would he long for someone like Youngjae, when he can have anyone he wants?

Most of the time, Daehyun feels like a celebrity; sometimes even he feels more popular than some boy band who has just made their debut. And he wants to keep it that way. Daehyun, truthful to his dreams, is a fine human creation like a perfectly tailored suit. Not only does he possess good looks, but money also isn’t really an issue because his father is the CEO of a multinational real estate company. Basically, Daehyun is a perfect example of top quality jewelry.

So why would a first-rate gemstone dream of someone? He doesn’t even talk to Youngjae despite being classmates since the middle school. Why of all people, is it Youngjae?

“I hate him.” That’s all Daehyun could ever come up with.

 

“I don’t want Youngjae to appear in my dreams.”


	2. Part 1: Beauty Lies Within

Once upon a time, in a land of the Morning Calm, an eighteen year old bachelor lives a life of gold. He has everything his heart desires, and will have everything his heart will require. Jung Daehyun may have been a superior precious stone that everyone wanted to have but not all jewels are perfect. Sometimes, because of the inherent beauty that can be seen by the naked eye, people fail to realize what’s wrong on the inside. Daehyun may have been given the perfect face, the flawless life – almost a prince in disguise -- but everything comes with a price. This near prince is selfish, spoiled and unkind. But what’s more alarming is that everyone around him treats him like a King, almost - all except for one.

But then, one regular day, all things start to change. When Jung Daehyun is walking towards the university because his limousine broke down (he mentally notes to himself he’ll have to fire his mechanic) a man grabs him by his arm and tries to rob him, but an old beggar man comes to his rescue, but instead of being grateful, Daehyun accuses the beggar of wanting to rob him, too.

Later that night, a person knocks on Daehyun’s abode; the beggar is asking for a piece of bread, but Daehyun warns his servants that no food shall be taken out of the house and no such beggar shall be within the vicinity of his house. It begins to rain, and the pitiful beggar cries for help in exchange for a precious necklace. Instead of warming up, Daehyun, repulsed by his haggard appearance, sneers at the gift, and asks his guards to throw the beggar away.

The beggar tries to free himself from the guards’ hold and before disappearing, he leaves a warning:

  


  
_Appearances can deceive you, for Beauty is found within._  
Appearance is just a façade and what’s within shall be the outer shell.  
When the moon shines the brightest, you shall see, what’s inside you shall be revealed. You can only break the words when you learn to love another and earn a love in return  
but if on your 21st birthday you shall not succeed  
then the words will be permanent  
and you’ll stay as ugly as a beast. 

  
“He’s insane,” Daehyun declares and warns the guards to do their jobs properly. “I don’t want to see him anywhere near my house or eles you are all fired!”

Despite the warning, Daehyun refuses to believe, so he stayed as he is. And on the following night, the moon shines the brightest.

He wakes up and only to realize he lost everything.

He looks into the mirror and what he sees isn’t him.

With regret and sorrow, he decides to hide himself, conceal his horrible face. He’s more than persuaded that no one will love him. Two years has passed and still, he hasn’t changed.

And now, he only has a year. Will he be able to find someone?

~~~~~~ 

  
It’s funny how fate decides to play with someone’s life. How it easily twists and turns someone’s destiny.

Youngjae has been living alone for the past year in their shabby old house with barely enough money to keep him alive. Lucky for him, he’s bright, or else he would have not won the college scholarship. His mother always said before she passed away when Youngjae was 10 that her son’s heart was big and kind. And it’s a problem because even though Youngjae has a golden heart, he is at a disadvantage because he let people manipulate him. And maybe, his kindness will be a contributing factor to his unhappiness. At a young age, little Youngjae couldn’t decipher what that meant but maybe he does now.

The letter has been delivered just today, a week before his birthday, but it was dated 2 years ago. It’s absurd how his father comes up with novel-like ideas expecting it’ll arrive exactly January 24th. Youngjae laughs at how pathetic the mailing service is but reads the letter anyways. Then, he wishes he didn’t because it is his dad’s last will, sort of. It’s his dad last – will, but not the typical last will. Youngjae’s family isn’t living luxuriously --they barely had enough to get by a day and Youngjae definitely knows his dad doesn’t have any hidden fortune.

Youngjae honestly struggles to read word per word and every word added to a sentence makes Youngjae’s heart sink. The memory of his father smiling to him before he bids his final goodbye is coming back to his mind.

But nonetheless, Youngjae continues to read it, his dad has told him through the letter words of forgiveness because he couldn’t give Youngjae the best thing in the world; words of gratitude, thanking Youngjae for being the best son; words of praise, wanting to let his son know how proud of a dad he is. Youngjae can’t help but cry. He misses his dad.

It takes some time before Youngjae continues to read and once again his heart sinks. The last words are vague but Youngjae is sure these words are his dad’s last message. The mourning ends too soon when the door swings open, startling him.

The funniest thing about fate is it doesn’t give you any warning when it wants something from you. All you have to do is to accept it as is.

“Are you Yoo’s son?”

“Yes?” Youngjae hesitantly says. The look on the stranger’s face isn’t all that reassuring, ike he knows something he's about to deliver a horrible message.

The words are terrifyingly simple, as if they are placed perfectly together to reach a common goal, “Your father left a huge debt.”

Youngjae isn’t the one to be afraid; they’ve got nothing. “Take whatever you want,” he thoughtlessly replies. All the men can do is to take what -- clothes? Feel free.

The man laughs in retort, mocking Youngjae. “We don’t want anything. We want you.”

_Should he call the police? Can he dash all the way to the back door?_

“According to the contract he signed, if he won’t be able to pay the debt. He’ll be working for it but he won’t be able to now, won’t he?”

Youngjae’s eyes widen because he clearly knows what they’re implying and --

“So you’re going to pay your father’s debt.”

The next thing Youngjae knows is that he is in unfamiliar place in the outskirts of Seoul.

“All you need to do is to clean the house, make breakfast, lunch and dinner. Feel free to use the rooms.”

The panicking would have ended a long time ago if the very first thing this old guy said was that Youngjae would just be a house helper. It would have saved them a lot of time and all the running and punching would have not happened. But all that is in the past and though a normal person needs to worry about his life, Youngjae thinks otherwise-- his mind is already calculating the distance from this place to his school. Based on Youngjae’s calculations, travel time will be an hour. He is thankful, more than thankful, because despite all things that are happening, he still has a place to live in and he can still continue to study. _Right? Education is an important thing. He needs the scholarship. His parents wanted him to be a doctor so he’ll be one._

“Call me Mr. Kang. If you'll follow me, I'll show you to your room. Welcome to your new home.”

_It isn’t all that welcoming._

“I assume you know how to drive? The car keys are hanging just beside the fridge. If there’s an emergency, use the car. I’ll be the one doing the grocery shopping. I left some cash in your drawer, in cases of emergency.”

Youngjae takes it all in, one by one, somewaht confused. He wonders how his dad is indebted to the man because as far as he remembers, his dad never wanted to live a life of gold. He is brought out of his trance when Mr. Kang speaks again.

"Here is the deal,” Mr. Kang says with a soft sigh at the end. “To be honest, no one wanted this job. Everybody is declining. We’ve already asked people outside Korea but they all quit without even getting their first paycheck.” Mr. Kang sighs heavily and Youngjae notices the hint of exhaustion.

Youngjae wonders just why? Is he going to take care of some criminal? An animal? A person with a terrifying desease?

“Just do what he says and if he is in a bad mood, be extra understanding because he needs it. All you have to do is to do the chores. You can still study while working, and we’ll give you an allowance, but make sure you come back. If you don’t -- well, we’ll hunt you down.”

Youngjae wants to laugh because he has given no other option. Of course, he needs to be in this place, he needs to settle his father's debt or else his life won't be peaceful and he cannot hide. What can little Youngjae do? Hide? That's funny.

“Here’s a phone. Daehyun will call you if he needs anything. The schedule is posted on your room. Make sure you abide by it.”

_So his name is Daehyun._ Youngjae knows he hears the name before but cannot pin point as to when and where, he decides he'll just try to remember later.

Youngjae tries to see the better things, the slightest positive moments in all the negativity. It’s one of his best assets that makes him qualified to be put to so many life changing tests. Sometimes, Youngjae thinks his best qualities are also the worst.

“I’ll visit every once in a while. He -- Daehyun -- isn’t a people person,” Mr. Kang adds, and then he bids goodbye.

Now Youngjae is alone, and has to take care of someone who lives by the name of Daehyun. But he doesn’t mull over how pathetic his life has become -- suddenly being indebted for the decisions he didn’t make while having no one to support him, living as an an orphan. Youngjae sees the positives in all the negativity surrounding him because now he gets to live in a big house with a continuous flow of food and maybe there’s free wifi and cable too. _That doesn’t sound too bad, does it?_

What then welcomes him as he unlocks his bedroom door is a haven; the room he has been given is spacious, definitely bigger than what he has back home. It isn’t a surprise. The house is humongous, and it’s twice, no thrice or even four - five times bigger than Youngjae’s, but he can’t helped but be at awe. How lucky the person who owns this house must be. He sees a sturdy desk and there’s even a bookshelf too, and excitement begins to replace his apprehension.. _It’s definitely not that bad._  


~~~~~

 

But it’s silent.

It’s all hushed.

Youngjae once argued that silence cannot in any manner be deafening, but his best friend, Himchan, insists silence is a very scary occurrence. He doesn’t want to admit it but for the first time, Himchan is right because today Youngjae has proof of it; utter silence is really deafening.

So Youngjae starts to unpack to bring some noise into the house. It’s a simple task, a matter of folding and arranging his clothes in his drawers and putting away his toiletries in the bathroom. It is done in just a couple of minutes, no sweat wasted. He places the only framed photo of his family on top of his desk, but he has no time to travel to memory lane as the schedule posted captures his attention.

He reads it and is quite impressed but he’s weirded out a little bit because of how it specifically lays out the time Youngjae must be out of the house and how meticulous and strict it seems but he is sure he can abide by it. Is there some kind of monster in this house that is unleashed during the hours after dark?

Youngjae shrugs and continues to read the rest of the notes. They’re just about food, on what to and what not to cook. It’s pretty simple and easy to deal with. Not much of a hassle. He slowly makes his way out of the room to inspect the rest of the place. It’s big and modern and the furniture is all well-made, maybe some are imported from other countries. But the house has a different feel too. There’s an aura of sadness, and Youngjae wonders why.

_Cook a meal for three, do the laundry regularly, always serve dessert._

It's a fairly easy task.

There’s a library and a game room. _Boy, the owner of this house is surely a hell of a rich man._ And Youngjae wonders why the past helpers decided to leave; this is a peaceful and cozy house to live in.

After tourning the some of the rooms, Youngjae decides to spend his first hours sprawled on his bed. There aren’t any dirty clothes to wash, nor spots in the house to be cleaned. Seriously, if this will be a regular thing, it isn’t paying a debt, it’s living a bum life.

So he lies on his bed and promises not to fall asleep.

He falls asleep.

But then there’s something so noisy that interrupts Youngjae’s slumber. He is sure it isn’t an alarm because he didn’t set one up. It’s a Sunday, so he doesn’t have to be up for some lectures or quizzes.

“What the fuck is that noise?” Youngjae grumbles while he tries to lift himself up to locate the nonstop noise.

With half lidded eyes, and half awake brain, Youngjae manages to realize it’s a phone that’s ringing, he answers, “Hello, why the fu..”

“Where is the food?”

“Huh?”

“Aren’t you supposed to be making the food?”

“Food?” Youngjae asks, unsure why the hell he needs to be preparing food, he could have just bought something in the nearby store. And why the hell is this man yelling at him through the phone?

“It’s your first day and you’re slacking off. Go and make some food.”

“What the hell is wrong with..” Oh my God. Youngjae realizes. _Oh my God._

And Youngjae makes the most delicious food he can come up with in 15 minutes. Luckily he was a fan of Rachel Ray's 15 minute meal before. He sets aside the first degree burns his skin suffers from all his cramming and the small cut on his left pointy finger due to his panicking. At last, it's finished.

He dials in the number.

“Uhm, hello?” he tries.

“What?”

“Dinner is served.”

There’s a laugh on the other end of line.

“I’m not hungry anymore. Throw it in the trash.”

"Wha--"

And the line goes _beep beep beep_.

~~~~~~

 

The second day, Youngjae luckily remembers he has a job and his day starts off perfectly well. He prepares breakfast for an hour, but in the end what he serves are plainly bacon and eggs -- what took a lot of his time was him contemplating whether to make the meal edible or not.

Sadly, he chose the first one.

According to the schedule, he needs to leave before the clock hits seven in the morning. _Is he some kind of Cinderella?_ It’s 6:45 and his classes start at 9, and that’s pretty long time but he doesn’t complain. Rules are rules so _adios_ Mr. Rude Boy.

But well, Youngjae has a big heart. When Daehyun wakes up, rude boy sees the food perfectly plated with a note:

__ Since it was a written that I can’t return home until 5pm,  
your lunch is in the fridge, just use the microwave. You know how to use it, right?  
-Youngjae 

 

“He knows how to use the microwave, right?” Youngjae asks suddenly over their lunch break.

“What?” Himchan asks, stunned. He isn’t aware that Youngjae works for someone and he’s pretty sure Youngjae is an orphan and that Youngjae doesn’t date anyone.

“What if he doesn’t know how to microwave?” Youngjae asks again and Himchan looks at him worriedly.

“Yoo Youngjae, are you on drugs?”

“Oh my god, what if he doesn’t know how to freaking use the microwave?”

“I’m taking you to the doctor.”

Youngjae excuses himself and goes to the nearest bathroom, he dials in the number. He needs to make sure. Upon a couple of rings, finally, the line picks up. “Uhm, hello?” Youngjae asks.

“What?”

“Have you seen the food in the fridge?” He asks.

“Yeah.”

“Do you know, uhm, well, perhaps, how to microwave?”

“I’m not an idiot. Of course I know.”

“Because, I’m just---”

And the line goes _beep beep beep beep beep_ again.

 

Youngjae has been accustomed to his schedule and the _beep beep beep_ sound. He leaves after he serves breakfast and goes home before dinner. He always leaves something so his boss can just microwave his food for lunch. He doesn’t forget to write small notes on the side.

_I’ll clean everything once I’m back._

_I hope you have a good day._

_Just call when you need something._

_I’ll buy a chocolate cake later._  


~~~~~

 

It has been a week and Youngjae has been alternating his study and work. And who would have thought that Youngjae lives better now than in those past two years that he's alone. At least now, he has someone with him. Who he hasnt seen ever since but that is beside the point. Youngjae is feeling happy.

He has heard his boss’s voice when he’s rudely demanding something, as always, over the phone. Sometimes he sees him on his peripheral view but not for more than 2 seconds. He still doesn’t have an idea to what his boss looks like, not that it truly mattered, but it is a little troubling not knowing the face of the one you’re serving. Curiosity is killing him.

Mr. Kang visits him again this week and the old guy looks genuinely happy to see Youngjae still living in the house. It’s a Saturday and that means it’s Youngjaes time to clean, do the laundry and pretty much anything else he wants inside the house. Youngjae calls it free time. Mr. Kang joins Youngjae for lunch after they both stacked the cabinets for the newly bought groceries.

“Why won’t Daehyun join us?”

“He’s not a people person.” Mr. Kang replies strictly and Youngjae notices it’s the end of the topic.

He doesn’t tell much about their boss and the questions raised by Youngjae are always answered vaguely. He thanks Youngjae after he finishes his lunch, and he also hands him an envelope too.

Today, Mr. Kang visits Daehyun inside his bedroom. And to Youngjae’s delight, he sees a stash of cash in the envelope and he wonders again, if this jobs pays this much, why would people just leave? To celebrate, he tries something new as he takes out the cookbook Himchan has brought for him a couple of days ago, reminding him it's not healthy to microwave food. He checks the cupboard to see if they have enough ingredients and to his delight, there’s more than enough.

And Youngjae spends his time making a new menu.

“Let’s make some blueberry cheesecake.”

~~~~~~

 

It’s not all very reassuring when someone with a normal face and a normal life tells you everything will be alright.

_Nothing is okay. Nothing will ever be okay._

“Daehyun. You need to go out of this house.”

Daehyun feels as if Mr. Kang is telling a joke that involves him. Go out? Who is he kidding?

“You need to find the one who will love you.”

The words are uttered in a simple manner as if the goal is easy to achieve. Daehyun wants to laugh his anger out and at the same time punch Mr. Kang for his silliness. Love? That’s bullshit.

Everything was fine, was perfect, everything was Jung Daehyun. The boys wanted to be like him, the girls swooned over him. He was perfect, he was flawless. Jung Daehyun was the Jung Daehyun but everything disappeared in just one night.

Everything now is gone, ripped from him only to leave scars, burned marks, black disgusting spots marring his once perfect face. He has tried everything, even plastic surgery but the same scars would come back after every operation so he stopped or they get worse.

Friends won’t be able to recognize him. His family left him; he only has his uncle who continues to help him but he’s sure Mr. Kang is also horror-struck with him. If he weren’t, he would be the one taking care of him not some helper he hired.

Daehyun pities himself. When he looks into the mirror, he doesn’t even recognize himself.

He is a monster.

He is a beast.

How long has it been since he was cursed? 6 months 1 year? He refuses to remember, he refuses to believe, but every time he sees himself in front of the mirror, he always remembers.

_On your 21st birthday…_

What are the odds? He only has a year. But he doesn’t care now though because who would dare to love someone who is uglier than a beast?

“Daehyun, let me help you. It’s your birthday soon, if you want to return back to your old self, you need to find someone Daehyun, please.”

Daehyun laughs.

“Get out,” he says, but Mr. Kang refuses to stand up from his spot. “I said, get out now.”

And Mr. Kang does but before he closes the door, he says, “Daehyun, I know, someone is out there for you, the one that will truly love you.”

And the door closes with a loud thud.

_Love? Me?_

“No one will love me.” Daehyun’s voice is muffled by his pillow while tears stream down from his eyes. “Why me?”

 

Youngjae hears the loud bang of the door and he almost drops the tray he is holding. A little over a minute later, Mr. Kang is bidding him goodbye, telling him that he’ll be back again next week.

“Is that cheesecake?” Mr. Kang asks before leaving the dining room. Youngjae nods in affirmation.

“He loves cheesecake. Serve him 3 slices.”

  


~~~~~

 

It’s almost 9 pm and Youngjae hasn’t heard Daehyun’s voice yet. He is sure that the guy hasn’t eaten anything since lunch. And this isn’t the typical Daehyun. The guy should have devoured the food before 7pm -- it’s in the schedule -- but the food Youngjae prepared has gone the way of a neglected bouquet of flowers, been like the flowers, slowly withering.

Youngjae paces back and forth, his mind debating whether to leave what he prepared outside the bedroom door or to check on Daehyun. _Would he be crossing a line? But Daehyun needs to eat._ _Will Daehyun eat the food if leaves it on the dinner table?_

“What to do?”

He walks back to his bedroom leaving the food on the dinner table because he has a test on Monday. He should be studying.

“Ugh.” He curses multiple times as he goes back to the kitchen. The food is staring at him with all its gloriousness, and the cheesecake is begging to be eaten. _Damn it, dont look at me like that!_

After much battling with himself, resisting a couple of times and giving in after, Youngjae curses again. “Fuck, this is harder than my Anatomy test.”

Youngjae, with an effort to make it as quiet as possible, knocks softly on Daehyun’s bedroom door. But though he makes sure it’ll be soft as a tap, the sound bangs in his ears and he cringes. He can’t take it back, it’s now or never.

~~~~~

 

“Daehyun, the food is ready, you can eat now, I’ll be at my room.”

Daehyun has the urge to scream at his employee but can’t find the energy to do so. He doesn’t have the appetite so he ignores it. Well, his helper will have the glory to throw them out tomorrow.

Daehyun spends his night mulling over the things he did years ago, A _m I the worst person on Earth? Did I really deserve this? Will someone really love me despite my horrible face?_

When it hits twelve, and his mood starts to brighten, he feels his stomach crumble in pain, _he needs a midnight snack_. He slowly lifts his body to open the door. He has a routine to keep his sanity intact but when he opens the door, his eyes widen, something in him rises up. His heart began to feel some warmth, a heat it has never experienced before.

_You haven’t eaten yet, it’s so not you.  
Hope everything will be okay.  
-Youngjae_

 

He opens the lid and upon seeing the cake, he hears his tummy grumble in response. As he takes a bite, it’s definitely the most delicious cheesecake he has ever tasted. And for the first time in two years, Daehyun’s lips form a curve.

~~~~~~

 

When Youngjae wakes up, he sees a single red rose lying on his bedside table.

~~~~~

Daehyun has a secret. He tries to hide it when Youngjae is in his home, and he hopes no one will discover it or he won’t be able to continue doing it. It’s a a routine: the first time was an accident; the second time was curiosity; and the third time, he was addicted.

_Youngjae's eyelashes are long, almost like a girl’s._

Daehyun knows this because he's been watching Youngjae sleep for the past week. At first, he forgot that there was a new person joining him in the house so when he came across the kitchen and saw the room behind it with a light, he peeked a little and noticed that there was someone sleeping. He watched him for a little while until he began to move, and to Daehyun’s horror, he ran away almost tripping on his way back to his room. The second time, he was curious as to how his new helper looked because he hadn’t been able to see his facial features fully.

Daehyun told himself, _“This will be the last time,_ ” so he peeked a little while the man was asleep. Everything was at risk because if ever Youngjae woke up and saw him, he’s sure Youngjae would scream and run off, not only because of how he looks but also because of how creepy it is for someone to watch you while you’re sleeping.

Daehyun promised himself this would be the last time, but promises are made to be broken. Because the moment Daehyun saw Youngjae’s face, something warmed his heart. And then he became addicted because somehow, he found solace when he watched how peaceful Youngjae seemed. And he felt normal.

He doesn’t want to stop doing it. Satisfaction is the prize he’s receiving when he sees Youngjae and he can’t do it when the guy is conscious. _Who would want to see a horrible looking person? Who would want to be with a scary looking guy?_

Daehyun wants everything to keep the way it is.

But something happens unexpectedly.

The house is silent as it is every morning when Youngjae wakes up from his slumber. Today, Youngjae unexpectedly gets a text from Himchan notifying him of the sudden cancellation of classes. It’s undoubtedly great news because Youngjae needs a couple of free hours before his final exams. More free time means added hours to his study session and a couple of minutes to sleep.

After making breakfast, he decides to take a nap.

Everything happens so fast, as if the minutes tick by more quickly than they are supposed to. Youngjae steps outside his bedroom, still yawning while rubbing his left eye. All he wants to do is to get some water from the kitchen, so he does, but unexpectedly someone’s in the kitchen too. He’d forgotten about the schedule.

And then Youngjae sees him.

Daehyun's eyes widen and panic sets in, the hot chocolate he just made pours into his hand while the mug shatters in the floor. He quickly rushes to his bedroom, not minding the pain his right hand is feeling.

All Daehyun wants to do is to hide himself, to hide his ugly face. He’s sure Youngjae is freaking out by now and probably the guy is already packing his things and preparing to storm out of the house. And it pains Daehyun. Everyone who manages to see him runs away. Everyone is afraid of him, terrified of how he looks. They are disgusted. There were people who screamed and called him a monster. Some even fainted.

Daehyun is shaking, is shivering from the fear, from the sorrow. He blames it on himself because of how horrible he became. He wants to scream and shout. He curls himself like a ball, because he is hopeless. He is a beast.

"Open the door."

Daehyun hears a voice outside of his room.

“Daehyun, open the door.”

He hears the voice again and it’s definitely not Mr. Kang.

"Damn it, Daehyun, open the door." Daehyun is convinced that it’s Youngjae. Really, everything is like a rollercoaster ride, Daehyun doesn’t know what to feel. Why is Youngjae not running away, why does Youngjae want to see him again? Why? Why? Why?

And then he can’t hear Youngjae anymore. Is he gone? Did he leave too?

A few heartbeats pass. Daehyun hears the door click. Youngjae is approaching him, and not a single trace of fear can be seen in Youngjae’s face.

This time, his heart picks up speed and the adrenaline kicks in. Youngjae is reaching out for him, his fingers trailing down his injured hand. Daehyun tries to jerk away from his touch but Youngjae tighten his hold onto his hand.

"Stay still,” Youngjae demands. “I need to know the extent of damage.”

"W-what?" Daehyun replies, shocked.

"I said, don’t move," Youngjae orders while inspecting the hand. “Good thing it wasn’t third degree burn.” Youngjae lets out a sigh of relief.

“Wait here,” Youngjae instructs again. “I need to get some ice.”

Youngjae leaves and Daehyun feels a certain pang in his heart. He doesn’t voice it out though -- that he doesn’t want Youngjae to leave because he’s afraid that if Youngjae leaves, he won’t be back -- but after less than a minute, Youngjae enters the room again, carrying a bucket full of cold water.

Youngjae strengthens his hold on Daehyun’s wrist. “Tell me if the pain subsides okay, I need to know.” Daehyun nods in reply.

It takes awhile before the pain will go away. Youngjae takes a moment to look into Daehyun’s face.Youngjae couldn’t really say he expected that Daehyun would look like this. He drew his own conclusions and thought Daehyun wouldn’t look ‘normal’ since he did not allow anybody aside from Mr. Kang to see him.

There are evident scars on Daehyun’s face. Just underneath Daehyun’s right eye are burn scars. It’s definitely not an attractive sight to see. No wonder people get scared. Youngjae offers a kind smile and continues to tend to Daehyun’s injury. Daehyun merely watches Youngae because it’s the only thing he can do.

It takes them around fifteen minutes when Daehyun softly replies that he can no longer feel the pain. Youngjae then covers the burn with a sterile gauze bandage and keeps air off the burn, reduces pain and protects blistered skin.

“If it continues to hurt, tell me, okay?” Youngjae says. “So I know if you need to take some pain relievers.”

“O.okay” Daehyun manages, suddenly turning away, heart hammering against his chest. “Are you not afraid?”

“Why would I be afraid?” Youngjae says casually while he stands up, shoulder moving upwards.

It’s barely a whisper but Youngjae manages to catch it:

“I’m ugly. I scare people.”

“Well you don’t scare me,” he says.

“Daehyun.” Youngjae says. Daehyun feels a shiver roaming down his spine and it’s quite an unfamiliar word travelling from Youngjae’s lips despite the numerous times the young male has uttered his name through the telephone. It’s atypical hearing his name and his stomach does this summersault.

Youngjae offers a smile, “I won’t leave. And you’re not ugly. You don’t scare me. Beauty is not found on the outside; it’s always on the inside.”

Youngjae picks up the bucket, the first aid kit and walks towards the door, “I made hot chocolate and there’s still some leftover cheesecake I made yesterday, and it’s lonely if I eat alone.” Youngjae says just before he leaves the room, “I’d be delighted if I can share them with someone.”

And the door softly shuts.

Daehyun’s heart speeds up. The pace going up and down, slow and then fast. It takes him a good five minutes for his heartbeat to calm down. He musters the courage to move away from his bed, cautiously taking small steps toward his door.

 

He takes unhurried steps and soon his feet are dragging him towards the kitchen.

He sees Youngjae sitting in the chair, a slice of cheesecake already on his plate and another plate just in front of Youngjae’s. He smells the aroma of the hot chocolate filling in his nostrils.

For the first time in two years, Daehyun is not eating alone.

He’s with someone. He’s with Youngjae.

~~~~~~

 

Usually, friendship starts with a common interest, but Youngjae and Daehyun’s relationship isn’t even close to a common companionship. What started their friendship isn’t considered anordinary occurrence, because it began with a cockroach.

_A flying cockroach._

To be exact.

 

After the hot chocolate incident, Daehyun still refuses to eat with Youngjae. Sure, a significant change happened but Daehyun still keeps to his room. But everything soon starts to change.

Screams echo through the doors and Youngjae almost spills the hot soup he’s making on himself. He dashes his way to Daehyun’s bedroom, stopping on his tracks when he reaches the door. He isn’t allowed to enter, right? That’s one of the rules and as a good employee, one must follow…

“Youngjae!”

The scream is so loud that Youngjae’s reflexes get the better of him. He robotically opens the door but still has the sanity to not step inside.

“What the fuck are you doing there? Come in here!” Daehyun demands.

“Are you sure? Because--”

“Just come here!”

And Youngjae enters.

“Whoah,” he says, taking into account every detail in the master bedroom, since he didn’t really have the chance to observe it back when he tended Daehyun’s injury. It’s pretty normal, not like what he imagined, and he settles for, “Your room is neat.”

“Kill him, kill him!” Daehyun begins to frantically scream as he pushes his body into the corner. Youngjae side eyes him, judging his employer from head to toe. He checks out something and he sees a cockroach just by the wall and he sighs.

“Seriously?” he says.

 

Daehyun angrily replies, “What?”

“Daehyun,” Youngjae says, “that thing can’t harm you.”

And the cockroach suddenly unleashes its wrath and starts to fly around Daehyun’s room.

“Jesus Christ Youngjae, kill it.” Daehyun orders again. “Kill it! Please.”

So Youngjae does, with his left slipper.

_May you rest in peace, cockrochie._

 

“So.” Youngjae hands Daehyun a cup of hot chocolate.

Preparing the hot chocolate takes no more than five minutes but trying to explain to Daehyun that the bug is lying on the ground lifeless and can’t harm him in any matter possible takes almost an hour.

Daehyun is too horrified with the events that just transpired and getting out of his room is a challenge because what if there are others? What about its husband or wife -- or worse -- children?

Daehyun’s body is still shaking, the fear still lingering. “Not another word Youngjae,” Daehyun warns, stuttering, his voice failing him as he struggles to say the words. He slowly reaches for the cup. “I could have died.”

“Dae--”

“I said not a word.”

Youngjae let out a long distressed sigh, “Okay, okay, fine. But I need to sleep now. I have an early class tomorrow so goodnight and just put it in the sink, I’ll handle everything tomorrow.”

“I don’t want to sleep in my room.” It’s almost a whisper and Youngjae finds it hard to decipher what Daehyun has said.

“What?”

“I don’t want to sleep in my room. I can’t.”

Okay, so by now, Youngjae is trying hard not to laugh because the poor guy has already experienced a bad day. So with much difficulty hiding his laughter, he forces his body to shrug and he subsequently replies, “Then sleep in the guest room. Case closed.”

“No, Jae, you don’t understand. I can’t sleep there, either. I can’t sleep anywhere. What if there are small disgusting things around? Its husband? Grandparents? Children? Or other relatives. I’ll be dead by tomorrow.”

This is getting out of hand, and Youngjae can’t help but stifle a laughter because seriously, relatives?

“I’m sorry,” Youngjae manages to blurt out in between his laughter.

“I’ll sleep in your room.”

And the laughter dies instantaneously, and the horror on Youngjae’s face is outstanding.

~~~~~

Youngjae doesn’t like sleeping with someone in the same roomThere’s a persistent feeling of needing privacy that prevents him from sleeping in the same room with someone, much less sleeping in the same bed.

“I’ll take that side of the bed,” Daehyun says as he jumps into the mattress. He makes himself comfortable under the sheets in the safety that is Youngjae’s bed.

Youngjae would love to use one of the guest rooms -- there are plenty, but he can’t. Daehyun refused him that chance to escape.

You’re paying your debt, Youngjae. And I demand this of you. There’s no saying NO.

When that didn’t work, his boss guilt tripped him.

Okay, sleep in the guest room and leave me here but once there’s a tiny creature that will travel around your room, you’ll be the one in charge of my corpse.

Youngjae knows it’s exaggerated but what can he do?

He sighs.

“I thought you have an exam tomorrow? Aren’t you going to sleep? And one more thing, turn off the lights. I can’t sleep properly, too bright.”

Youngjae sighs again.

~~~~~

 

The sun is starting to shine, it’s probably six in the morning. According to the schedule, Youngjae should have already preparing breakfast but he forgets to set an alarm and Daehyun just doesn’t want to wake him up yet.

Daehyun's heart races as soon as he wakes up only to realize how close they are, Youngjae’s face is inches away from him. And Youngjae is more beautiful up close, he’s never been this close with him before, and his heart beat speeds up.

He lets himself stare as long as he wants. Youngjae won’t wake up, he knows. He’s breathing fine and Daehyun wonders if Youngjae is dreaming. And he is content to watch him, not minding the schedule, not minding breakfast, not minding the world.

Every time he watches Youngjae sleep, he feels elated; there’s something in him that wants to keep looking, to keep staring. And now, it’s the same but different all at once because he’s watching him sleep but he doesn’t need to do it secretly.

He smiles, again, the second time in 2 years.

_How long can I continue to watch you?_  



	3. Beast in Hiding

_We always question everyone, why am I not happy? Why can't I find someone? Will I be alone for the rest of my life? We're always looking, but sometimes what we need is to stop. Because true love comes, sometimes we just dont have an idea that it's already a room a way from us._

_Sometimes, people realizes it a little earlier than others, but there are people who needs a trigger._

It takes Youngjae several moments before he realizes he can’t lie to himself any longer. It’s funny how gradually is happened and how he didn’t realize he was developing...feelings.

It happens the first time when he sees the rose on the day of his twentieth birthday. The way his heart has suffered from abnormal beating when he reads _Happy birthday Youngjae –Daehyun._ The memory is a haze, but he remembers Daehyun making something for breakfast instead of him doing the cooking. Daehyun says birthdays are important and should be celebrated. Youngjae is sure Daehyun called Mr. Kang  too because the old man brought pizzas and a cake. Mr. Kang might have been throwing not so subtle teasing glances at him. It’s all very sudden that Youngjae has to cancel his plans with Himchan because everything is unexpectedly happy.

The second time it happens is when Youngjae forgets his umbrella and the rain starts to pour with no intention of calming down. There’s a storm and even if he did bring his umbrella, it wouldn’t have been useful in the raging storm. He sends a text to Daehyun informing his boss that he won’t be able to make it home and will crash at someone’s place for the night but he receives an unexpected call in return.

“Don’t leave the school grounds. I’ll come and get you.”

Youngjae freezes from his spot because Daehyun fears the outside of his room; Daehyun is afraid to see people, but why will Daehyun risk the chance of being seen just to get him? He tries to send a couple of text messages saying, “No, Daehyun, it’s okay. I can just sleep at my friend’s house.” But he doesn’t get a reply in return. He tries to dial in Daehyun’s number but he receives no answer.

Himchan sees him waiting by the shed in front of the university and asks if he wants to just stay at his place. Youngjae says thanks but refuses. No matter how much Himchan tries to convince him, Youngjae denies him and tells him he’ll be alright.

Half an hour has passed, and a familiar blue car stops in front of Youngjae. He sees the driver’s door open and a man clad in a jacket, a mask and a hat runs toward him. The man drape his arm around Youngjae protectively, securing Youngjae so he won’t be drenched by the rain.

“Sorry it took so long, I had a hard time finding a mask,” Daehyun says as he removes the black thing covering his mouth.

“Dae--” Youngjae says and he wants to keep on talking, he wants to continue asking Why did you do this? What if something happens to you on your way here? What are you thinking? There are a lot of words that need to be said but Youngjae settles for the best reply, short, simple and sincere: “Thank you.”

The third time it happens is when someone tries to break into the house. It’s almost dawn when Youngjae is awakened by a loud bang and his instinct gets the best of him. He runs towards Daehyun’s room only to realize Daehyun has been running to his too.

“Are you alright?” Daehyun asks, face full of worry, as he scans Youngjae’s body on any sign of injury.

Youngjae says yes. The banging sound stops when the police’s siren can be heard in the background.

“There’s someone trying to get inside. I already called the police. Don’t worry, you’ll be safe.”

But Youngjae isn’t worried for himself. He voices his concern. “Daehyun, if the police come, they’ll see you.”

“I--I never--” Daehyun says, “I’ll just hide in a room.”

To their luck, the police never goes inside the house to investigate but promise to keep a good eye on the area as robbery has been rampant the past few weeks.

They both decide to sleep in the same room and Youngjae’s bed suffers once again. The first time they slept together, side by side, Youngjae found it hard to sleep and was only called by the sandman just before the sun started to shine, but now it’s different; Youngjae feels secure and comfortable, like this is what it is supposed to be.

The fourth time it happens is when Youngjae practices photography. Youngjae and the camera are soulmates, even though he doesn’t really have one and has to borrow Himchan’s. They are soul mates – Youngjae and Himchan’s camera.

The day Himchan once finally lends the camera to him again, he tries to take photos of the furniture in the house and Daehyun catches him.

“What are you doing?” Daehyun says.

“I’m sorry.” Youngjae replies, “I just want to try something out.”

“You like photography? I thought you’re taking up medicine?”

“It’s just a hobby whenever Himchan lends this baby to me?”

“Who’s Himchan?”

“A friend,” Youngjae says, hesitating.

After a week, Youngjae is surprised to see one of the latest camera models on his desk. You have got to be kidding me. His instantly goes into Daehyun’s room and returns the gift.

“It’s too much. I can’t accept this. I’m sorry”

Daehyun grabs his hand before he moves away.

“But it’s a gift.”

“I told you, it’s too much.”

“Okay, let’s make a trade, then,” Daehyun tries and that gets Youngjae’s attention. “Teach me photography, and then this thing will be your payment.”

It’s a fairly good trade; Youngaje would want to take it in a heartbeat if he didn’t think the gift really was too much.

“Daehyun.”

“I won’t accept no for an answer. Because it will be such a waste if you won’t use it. I can’t use two cameras.”

And Youngaje sees it, Daehyun really has his own -- same model, same brand, even the same strap.

“I really want to learn photography, Youngjae. I don’t do anything in the house. I want to try to something new.”

Youngjae looks into Daehyun’s eyes, trying to catch a lie in those orbs but he can’t find anything.

“So, do we have a deal?” Daehyun asks again.

Okay so now, they are soulmates. Youngjae and Youngjae’s camera.

The fifth and subsequent times happen gradually. The photography lessons continue and they really keep Daehyun busy. Whenever Youngjae is away, Daehyun visits places he knows people will not be visiting and when he returns home, Youngjae is always in awe of the scenes and captured moments on Daehyun’s camera.

The little moments continue -- the simple exchange of messages when Daehyun is alone and Youngjae goes to class, the subtle glances -- and they are all fuel to the fire.

Now, though, Youngjae is stuck in a predicament because -- he should have known Daehyun would be the annoying type.

Daehyun is the type of boss who knows no privacy or boundaries. He’s a little too clingy too. But Youngjae doesn’t really complain; he’s used to it.

The continuous vibrations he feels in his pocket aren’t helping twist Daehyun’s image. He has to endure it because Professor Kim isn’t the friendliest and he reminds himself not to put his phone on vibrate anymore and instead to put it on silent so it won’t disturb anyone. Daehyun has learned the habit of texting him during classes, and it’s usually fine, but today is a little different because he doesn’t stop.

Right after class, Youngjae checks his phone and gasps when he sees what’s waiting for him.

“Woah.”

_24 messages. 43 miscalls._

And he panics because what if something has happened to Daehyun? Oh my God. Not reading a single text, he quickly dials Daehyun’s number and the sound of the telephone ringing is irritating, because why the hell is Daehyun not picking up? After a couple of tries, still, Daehyun does not answer. The next period is in 30 minutes, there’s a test, and Youngjae needs an A+.

Fuck the A+.

With trembling hands, Youngjae fights hard to put the key into the lock. He curses the key multiple times, and at last, after much fumbling, the door unlocks.

“Daehyun!” he shouts while running, searching every room, every corner. His heart pumps faster and the more it does, the more painful it gets. “Daehyun!” he tries once again. He recalls the news he watched last night, 2 bodies found in the recent robbery massacre.

His mind goes through various scenarios -- maybe Daehyun has gone to the supermarket, but the guy hates going out, he doesn’t step out of the house and if he does, he’ll call Youngjae. Maybe he was kidnapped? Oh my god, please no. Was he assassinated? Youngjae needs to stop imagining things and to think logically.

“Think Youngjae, _think_.” But his mind is blank and his heart is in pain.

He’s losing hope. He dials Mr. Kang’s number but the old guy also doesn’t answer. Youngjae tries to call Daehyun again, over and over, and on the 23rd ring, Youngjae’s heart beat speeds up because he hears a familiar voice, “Jae?”

“Fuck, Dae, where are you?” There’s evident fear in Youngjae’s voice and surely Daehyun hears it.

“I drove to the beach to get some photos, I texted you a couple of times. Youngjae, are you alright? What happened? Where are you? What’s wrong? Are you alright?”

“I--” Youngjae replies, the truth sinking in. “I’m in your house,” Youngjae says after a while but more calmly this time.

Youngjae feels stupid and wants to whack his brain for imagining things but he’s at ease too for knowing Daehyun is safe. Daehyun on the other hand keeps on talking nonstop, asking if Jae is okay or if something happened, but Youngjae can’t reply. He’s busy calming his heart.

He can't reach the living room with his heart beating the way it is, so he sits on the floor, a few steps from the main door.

A good thirty minutes have passed, and finally the door swings open and Daehyun sees Youngjae on the floor hugging his knees.

“Youngjae, are you alright? What happened to you? Oh my God, Youngjae. Say something. Are you okay?”

Youngjae looks at Daehyun, panic easing. It’s crazy how Youngjae can let all his emotions just flow around Daehyun.

Daehyun keeps on talking. He really can’t shut his mouth but Youngjae is glad because Daehyun is safe and because Daehyun is still with him.

“Fuck, Jae. Say something. What happened?”

Youngjae does the first thing that comes to his mind. And Daehyun is left with a zipped mouth as Youngjae pulls Daehyun close and envelopes him into a tight hug.

“I got an F during the exams,” Youngjae whispers. He knows he did because he just chose something more important than the exam. Daehyun doesn’t really need to know the reason why.

>>>

Youngjae is not sure how their friendship developed so hastily. He thinks it has something to do with both of them needing companionship. Daehyun is in a deep well and any form of camaraderie is very much welcomed, Youngjae on the other hand provides understanding and it leads to both of them reciprocating each other’s needs.

But Youngjae knows their friendship should stay as it is. Wanting to have more is like a child believing he can fly. Still, though, with just one word from Daehyun, Youngjae is put under a spell:

 

“Youngjae.”

Daehyun smiles and Youngjae still gives him his all.

>>>

Their friendship continues to escalate, the two finding common interests. The nights are spent watching movies on the living room while indulging into the sweetness of cakes. Sometimes, they play video games, too. Often times, when Youngjae is studying, Daehyun will be doing the same but with photography.

On the days when Youngjae has more free time, they drive to beaches and mountains, Daehyun always wearing his mask while Youngjae tries his best to hide him from people.

They’re friends -- they’ve become the best of friends.  
There’s a saying that goes, your best friend is your soul mate.

“Is he my soul mate?”

>>>

 

“Is someone keeping an eye on you?” Daehyun asks over dinner.

Youngjae’s mouth is too busy devouring the freshly cooked beef for him to answer Daehyun’s query.

Youngjae has been coming home a little later than usual and his explanation is he’s finishing a paper that’s due in a month, but whenever he goes home late, Daehyun sees someone walking away from his house.

“I saw you with a lanky man awhile ago.”

Youngjae scrunches his nose and tries to think hard, “Ah,” Youngjae finally replies then drinks his orange juice to clear his throat. “That’s Junhong.”

Daehyun narrows his eyes and tries to scan his brain for jumbled and blurred memories because he has heard the name before but he cannot pinpoint when and where. The growing curiosity is evident as he bombards a lot of question such as why, how and what but Youngjae refuses to answer every inquiry saying he’s entitled to have some privacy.

The old Jung Daehyun seemed to find comic relief in almost any scenario. Youngjae has taught him to see the positive in all the negative that’s happening, and even though there’s less than a week before his 21st birthday, Daehyun finds himself worrying not about the fact that he might look horrible for the rest of his life, but about this guy named Junhong.

There are three hundred sixty five days in a year, seven days in a week and Daehyun spends twenty two hours a day making the people who tried to be in a relationship with him regret their decision. That was before he was cursed, and Daehyun has lamented over the matter and realized his mistakes. He wants to undo them and be a better man. Maybe Youngjae would love that --

Wait, what? Where did that come from?

For the very first time, that night, he dreams of Youngjae.

  
>>>

 

Junhong comes over.

Daehyun hides in his room, promising himself that he’ll fire Youngjae, he’s going to fire Youngjae and find someone else, he is going to really fire Youngjae. He’ll call Mr. Kang and tell him to fire Youngjae.

_He won’t fire Youngjae_.

He walks back and forth in his bedroom because the Junhong kid is in his house. It happened just a few minutes ago when there was a loud booming sound that emerged from the door. At first, Youngjae and he thought there was some kind of commotion outside, both a little hesitant to check it out, but when they did, there was a tall guy soaked in water, shoulders hunched, head bowed down. Youngjae hysterically runs to get the guy, dropping the frying pan he’s holding. To Daehyun’s surprise, Youngjae didn’t even ask for his permission, he just let the tall guy in.

He let the kid, a complete stranger in Daehyun’s house.

He should really fire Youngjae. Ughhh.

To his utter relief, the tall kid must have been so depressed that Daehyun’s presence wasn’t even noticed. Youngjae was so focused on the giant kid, he didn’t even bat an eyelash when Daehyun poked him a couple of times.

Daehyun is taken aback because how could you Yoo Youngjae?

In the end, he walks into his bedroom.

After a couple of minutes, Daehyun can’t stand waiting any longer. He imagines different scenarios like the Junhong kid putting his hand over Youngjae’s. Or Youngjae making soup for the giant and then feeding him, or Youngjae hugging the kid, or worse the kid taking advantage of Youngjae and kiss….

He steps outside his bedroom. “Youngjae!” he shouts as loudly and as intimidatingly as he can.

“Yoo Youngjae!” he tries once again.

Youngjae emerges from the kitchen. “What?” he replies.

“Why are you letting a stranger into my house?”

Youngjae looks surprised. “Junhong isn’t a stranger,” he replies.

“I don’t know him.”

“I do, and he’s kind,” Youngjae rebuts. “Excuse me, but I need to take care of Junhong.”

The reality Daehyun lives in is a like a comedy show. Everything feels like a joke but everything is happening all at once. He realizes he doesn’t want Youngjae helping a person not who is not him. He doesn’t want to see Youngjae with someone that’s not him.

But maybe things work out when they're supposed to, not when they are planned to. Maybe it's all about timing, or maybe because of the tall kid --

True love has its own selfish thing. Sometimes it will take a while before it sinks and when it does, it will be so intense that every fiber of your body will move on its own.

It happens abruptly because maybe Daehyun is just too oblivious to realize.

“Youngjae,” Daehyun breathes. “I love you.”

Maybe, his feelings started to develop when Youngjae made cheesecake. Or maybe when Youngjae tended to his injury. Or maybe earlier, or maybe, it was during when he first laid eyes on Youngjae. But time isn't important, what's important is that he loves Youngjae.

It’s simple and short but the emotions contained in those three little words are strong.

It’s like a sip of a fine wine that travels from your lips and makes its smooth way to your throat and finally moves its way down making you want more. The kiss is unanticipated but not startling, just skin touching against skin briefly, but it’s fascinating how the touch explains one million words all at once.

Youngjae’s head is spinning, his heart is wildly beating. Everything is electric but he likes it.

And then Daehyun realizes what he has done. The look on his face is a mixture of horror and guilt and before he backs away and storms inside his room, he mutters, “I’m sorry”

Daehyun is certain Youngjae will leave him.

“I’m so, so stupid.” Daehyun blames himself for acting rashly. What if Youngjae leaves? What if Youngjae loves that Junhong kid. _No. No, just no_. Despite the rain, Daehyun hears the gate being opened and he quickly peeks out from his window. He sees Youngjae with an umbrella and Junhong outside.

Youngjae ruffles the tall kid’s hair and Daehyun feels his heart breaking, there's a terrible pain lingering in his chest just like when he's 4 and his father didn't make it on his birthday party. Or when his mother said she would make him cheesecake but ended up cooking nothing because his mother suffered a heart attack. But maybe the pain he is feeling today is worse. He stops looking.

Junhong leaves after. Relief washes over him as he realizes that Youngjae isn’t leaving with Junhong. He tells himself to say sorry to Youngjae a couple of times, saying what happened was an accident, and maybe what they had won’t change.

He hears a soft knock on the door.

“I’m coming in,” Youngjae announces.

“Youngjae, I’m sorry,” Daehyun begins. “I’m really sorry. Let’s forget it, okay. I’m really so--”

“I love you Daehyun,” Youngjae finally answers.

Love can be like a wave of vertigo in your mind. It’s disorienting. But sometimes it’s like a perfectly made cheesecake that melts in your mouth. Daehyun loves cheesecke. He truly does.

It’s enchanting.

Daehyun wants cheesecake, Daehyun kisses Youngjae again.

People expect that Daehyun will turn back, that the spell will be broken, just like in the fairytales.

But nothing happens. _The kiss didn’t work? Is it not love?_ Daehyun is sure it is love, but nothing happens because this isn’t a fairytale. Instead, Daehyun forgets about the curse and his mind focuses on only one thing: _Youngjae loves him too._

Just this morning Youngjae made Daehyun's bed. He's been making it for three months, and been working for Daehyun for five. In the time that's passed, he's realized that his heart has fallen completely for Daehyun.

It isn’t easy for them to slip between the sheets, not when Daehyun continues to breath into Youngjae’s neck words of praise, words of gratitude, words of love.

“I love you,” Daehyun breathes continuously.

“I love you,” Youngjae replies. It takes a couple of more minutes before Daehyun falls asleep, arm draped over Youngjae’s body. Youngjae kisses him again before falling asleep himself.

 

_We all have secrets. Secrets are memories, moments or things we did that we either want to keep privately to ourselves because of how precious they are or because we are ashamed and we want them to never existed in the first place. We all have secrets, and sometimes, we try hard to protect them from being revealed._

 

_Appearances can deceive you, for Beauty is found within._

The words are recurring, even in his sleep. They are haunting him.

_Appearance is just a façade and what’s within shall be the outer shell. When the moon shines the brightest, you shall see, what’s inside you shall be revealed._

_You can only break the words when you learn to love another and earn a love in return but if on your 21st birthday you shall not succeed then the words will be permanent and you’ll stay as ugly as a beast._

The words are ringing in his ears, warning him, taunting him, mocking him. Every word feels like a mockery. They are laughing at him.

_You’ll stay as ugly as a beast._

The words are coming true.

Youngjae loves Daehyun and Daehyun loves Youngjae but they don’t get their happily everafter because Youngjae’s words are coming into life.

Youngjae’s spell is going to come true.

>>>

 

Youngjae slowly untangles Daehyun’s hold on him. He loves Daehyun, he truly does, more than anyone, even more than himself. He realizes it slowly, painfully.

He peeks at the figure lying peacefully in the bed. Youngjae places a chaste kiss on Daehyun’s forehead and then he gets out of bed and escapes He has to run. He needs to break the spell.

He has enough time, and he has no doubt that he’ll be able to break it. He can do it, right? Of course he can, there’s some way, some written spell in the book.

He rushes out and leaves a simple note that tells Daehyun he’s gone to the university, because Daehyun doesn’t need to know the truth.

Youngjae must do something before Daehyun’s 21st birthday. It’s a month away. That’s plenty of time to break the spell, right?

Youngjae has to believe he can break it, because there’s a way, there has to be a way. Youngjae knows because he was the one who cast it in the first place so he’s sure he’ll be able to break it.

_No matter what it takes._

It was two years ago when everything started.

It was an accident, a spur of the moment decision, and Youngjae regretted it the moment the words escaped his mouth. He hadn't known his foolish words would form a spell so easily. He'd descended from a line of witches, of course he knew it though his parents had hidden this from him. He's intelligent and some time between his teenage years, he discovered the truth.

And on that day, where fate decided to play with them, Youngjae’s dad died all because of one selfish person. A person who decided to accuse his father of wanting to rob him after saving his life. He had pushed him into the road, not knowing that a fast approaching car would hit him.

Youngjae witnessed it all.

Youngjae’s father warned his son not to do anything, not to be eaten alive by anger and revenge, because once the spell is cast, it cannot be broken by person who cast it. No one escapes the power of words.

His father had died because of complications arising from the accident and Youngjae wanted to take revenge. He quickly went home and retrieved the spell book from where his parents hid it. He searched for the strong spells and disguised himself as an old beggar, but once he was in front of the house, his father’s words continued to replay on his mind. _No one escapes the power of words._ He then decided to give Daehyun a chance but instead of showing kindness, he showed Youngjae how cruel he could be instead.

Every day, Youngjae regrets what he did. Every hour, Youngjae’s heart breaks. Every second, Youngjae wishes he hadn’t cast the spell. But no matter how much he regrets, or how his heart breaks, or how he wishes for things, nothing is going to change.

Youngjae didn’t expect that he’d fall in love. The moment he saw Daehyun with those ugly scars, he remembered it all - that Daehyun was the person he cursed years ago. All he wanted to do was to help Daehyun find his true love and for the spell to be lifted quickly. He tried to search for people whose hearts were pure and intentions innocent. The first person had been Himchan, the second one Junhong, and then Youngjae stopped searching because the idea of Daehyun being with someone else brought some unexplainable emotion to Youngjae.

And now Youngjae is at a standstill. He never expected Daehyun to love him too but Daehyun did and he loves Daehyun too. He truly does.

“Where is it? Where is it?” Youngjae roughly searches all the closet and cabinets. He remembers hiding it somewhere in their old house. _It has got be here somewhere._

He finds the book and his hands are trembling. He scans the pages. He locates the spell he cast and looks for some kind of antidote or ways to lift it. But he doesn’t find anything. Daehyun loves him, right? And he loves Daehyun too. So why isn’t the spell broken if the requisites are already fulfilled? He distraughtly searches for answers until he finally lands on one in the last page of a book.

  
_A witch’s curse is a powerful play of verse._  
Once spoken, no one can be able to reverse.  
Unless the conditions are met,  
The spell will be permanent.  
Beware, for the words are powerful  
And the results are dauntingly awful  
For a witch cannot fulfill its own clause  
Unless he pay the price offering his own cause. 

 

Youngjae knows what the words mean, and his father’s last words replay in his mind, but what can he do? Everything is his own fault and he knows he must suffer.

The instructions are pretty simple, to lift the curse, all he needs is a strand of Daehyun’s hair and one of his own. But to revoke the spell has its tolls. Once broken, it cannot be undone and it will be permanent. Terminating one’s own casted spell will result in having the curse ricochet and all the effects will double but no conditions will be set. It’s the price a witch has to pay. A normal individual when the spell is revoked will lose his memory up until the day the spell is pronounced.

Youngjae thinks of the consequences: if he rescinds it, Daehyun will be able to live his life normally again but Youngjae has to take the upshot. Is he willing to do everything for Daehyun?

Youngjae goes back to Daehyun. It’s hard to keep his tears from falling but he needs to cry. Daehyun must not know. They can continue living like this, right? And he can continue to take care of Daehyun. He will continue to take care of Daehyun.

“Youngjae!”

He hears him and something is pulling Youngjae’s heart strings. When Daehyun sees him, the guy automatically wraps his hands around him and after a warm hug, he cups Youngjae’s face and places a soft kiss on his lips.

“I’m glad you’re back,” Daehyun says, a wide smile spreading across his face.

“I love you,” Youngjae utters.

Daehyun laughs unsurely. And shyly replies,  “And I love you too.”

They eat their lunch together, but Daehyun cooks their meal this time. Youngjae marvels at how Daehyun looks at him at how Daehyun says he is glad Youngja is with him and how sorry he is too for being ugly and how Youngjae doesn't deserve him because Youngjae is handsome and he isn't.

“Hey Daehyun,” Youngjae cuts Daehyun off in the middle of his sentence. "I don't care about your looks" He says.

“All I know is that I love you,” Youngjae says and he can see Daehyun’s cheeks turning a shade of red. “Always remember that.”

“I love you more, Youngjae,” Daehyun replies. "You don;t know how much I love you."

“I love you so much,” Youngjae breathes. “Always remember.”

"Of course, I will."

They finish their dinner and Youngjae says he needs to get some books in the library and Daehyun lets him, saying he’ll prepare dinner tonight and Youngjae needs to make cheesecake tomorrow. Youngjae says he can’t wait and he'll make the most delicious cheesecake.

He goes back home and calls Mr. Kang.

“I’m sorry,” Youngjae mutters. “I think I won’t be able to continue taking care of Daehyun. I’m really sorry.” By this time, Youngjae can feel tears running down his face.

And he ends the call.

“It’s now or never.”

 

It's Daehyun's 23rd birthday, he receives a gift from an anonymous sender. It's a cheesecake and the most delicious one he has ever tasted.

 

_Happy Birthday Jung Daehyun,  
I love you, always remember._  


>>>

Jung Daehyun dreams of Yoo Youngjae every time he sleeps, and he hates it. It started a month ago when he woke up from the hospital. His uncle Mr. Kang has told him he was in a car accident and in a coma for 3 years but the funny thing was he can't find any news about a car crash involving him, or any accident but Mr. Kang said to stop worrying and be glad he's back to normal.

At first, he wondered who the person was who kept appearing in his dreams. It began with a man calling his name over and over again until the man’s face started to become clear.

When he came back to school, he recognized a familiar face. It was frightening to know this was the same face as in his dreams.

In his dreams, Youngjae looks average -- normal. But when Daehyun wakes up, he quickly forgets how Youngjae looks in his dreams and the only appearance he remembers is the horrible looking Yoo Youngjae he sees during class. The Yoo Youngjae that everyone fears, the Yoo Youngjae that everyone mocks, the Yoo Youngjae everyone loathes to touch.

Jung Daehyun dreams of Yoo Youngjae, not knowing that his dreams are remnants of a reality that once had transpired.

Jung Daehyun dreams of Yoo Youngjae.

_And that’s all that ever will be._

 

Daehun falls asleep in Chemistry class, and he dreams again. He dreams of Youngjae wanting to be his partner. He dreams of Youngjae making cheesecake. He dreams of Youngjae tending to his burnt hand.

And then he wakes, Mr. Choi is scolding him. It’s all Youngjae’s fault

Yongguk treats him to hamburger and fries after Daehyun’s trip to the principal’s office. Daehyun has been sentenced to community service due to his continuous behavior in certain classes.

“So you’re telling me, it’s Yoo’s fault?”

Daehyun can’t believe Yongguk is asking him this question for the fourth time already. Of course it was Youngjae’s fault. He could have put something on Daehyun’s food so the latter will see Youngjae in his dreams.

“I told you, hyung, that Youngjae guy must have done something to me that made me dream of him,” Daehyun says in all seriousness.

“You _do_ know how stupid it sounds.” Yongguk gives him a questioning look. The guy sees the stupidity in everybody and wants to correct everything.

Daehyun heaves a depressing sigh because he knows it’s stupid, too, but what other possible reason is out there in the open? They say dreams are reality we long to come into contact with but in Daehyun’s experience, it’s the complete opposite. Why would he long for someone like Youngjae, when he could have anyone he wanted?

So why would a first-rate gemstone dream of someone? He doesn’t even talk to Youngjae despite being classmates with him. _Why of all people, is it Youngjae?_

“I hate him.” That’s all Daehyun could ever come up.

 

“I don’t want to see Youngjae in my dreams.”

>>>

 

Youngjae can take all the disgusted looks, the harsh words, the mockery and the sickened stares he gets from other people. All he wants is to see Daehyun, and though he has been bullied countless times, it doesn’t affect him. He recalls the days that Daehyun hid himself, that Daehyun feared even his own self. Everything is fine and will be fine as long as he still can see Daehyun, because being in the same class with Daehyun is enough, will be enough because he gets to see Daehyun. Even if that’s all that it will ever be.

_That’s the price he has to pay._

_True love never runs out. But sometimes, it isn’t true love, and that’s why it fades._

 

 

 

 

Jung Daehyun dreams of Yoo Youngjae.

“I love you.”

_Always remember._  



End file.
